This story is going to scream PREEEUUUS (aka Prius). My 6ft+ tall muscly full on American male, bought a 15 year old battery & gas operated Prius. This amuses me, my daughter, her best friends and even my brother immensely. It’s cute (okay it’s cute because it’s tiny) but I mean honestly, Jim looks ridiculous driving this thing.

Years ago I would not be caught dead riding in this shithole car. (I know, tell ya how I really feel right?) But fast forward and here I am saying, let’s go to the furthest Wal-Mart at 10pm on a Friday evening because Prius. Because Prius gets 50 miles per gallon. Because Prius allows us to park UP FRONT! Because Prius makes Jim drive less like a freakin’ lunatic (really the world is a better place ‘because Prius). But Prius does not look anything like my Jeep or Silverado. Let’s be real… she ain’t real purdy… she’s dented. She’s rusted. And she’s low riding. But inside – boy o boy – she’s interesting.

There’s a moment for the first ride I thought the damn car died and we didn’t even back out of the driveway. Because Prius was going into ‘Stealth mode’ as Jim says. You know that joke where the woman didn’t know her husband up and left in the middle of the night because he had a Prius and she didn’t hear the car start or move? Totes similar. The Prius works off battery and you literally can’t hear a darn thing. Honestly, where was this car when I needed to help friends in High School and early College years to stalk exes and their new loves? Would have been amazing I tell ya. Okay so the Prius came to life in 2001 when I was 21 but still, it wasn’t something I would have even contemplated owning.

3-5 hours of driving a day for my buff sweetie is the back story to the thousand dollar Prius. You can’t drive a truck with a V8 and be able to eat for the week too. So instead of $150 in gas a week, maybe its $40. Because Prius.

Believe it or not, I actually have a morale to this story… it isn’t always what is on the outside that counts. The inside is where all the good stuff happens. Just because something looks a certain way, doesn’t mean it is a certain way. And I know I called the car a shithole earlier, but she’s not… that was just my initial “can’t believe he’s buying that car” reaction. Now let me go back to ‘Because Prius’.

Because Prius, we have a super ass slow start at the red lights. It is darn near impossible to be first off out there. People pass us but then we pass them. Because Prius slow and steady starts always win out in the end. The sprint of life doesn’t work. A quick sprint here or there is okay, but it’s marathon that keeps on driving forward that wins out. You know – be a better person than you were yesterday? Reigns true my valued readers (all 3 of you).

There’s absolute fun in watching another driver roll up next to Jim in the driver seat and see their face when it isn’t a granny driving – why – because Prius. And it is even MORE fun when Jim has words with said persons because Prius they see a puppy dog. What they don’t know is my man is more resembling of a wolf and a crazy wolf to boot (which is awesome for me because we be a team). It gets fun.

And as soon as Jim pulls in the driveway today I’m going to be ready to go ridin’ along in his automobile. Because Prius saves money, the environment, miles and wear and tear on my trucks. And to be honest, it is fun. So bring it on stealth mode!